More Confusion

Things continued to deteriorate for me last week. There was a major holiday here on Tuesday called Holi. I’m not even sure what this represents from a religious point of view (nor does anyone else around here, so I’m not feeling too guilty about it). Regardless of its roots, it has become somewhat like Halloween, but without the treats. Kids go out in the street and throw water, powdered dyes and in particularly nasty situations, used motor oil, at anyone crazy enough to be out and about. The youngsters love it, the adults stay in. Everything is closed, public transit doesn’t run and if you can find a taxi actually working, you’ll easily pay double the normal fare. It is a day for staying locked up in your home. After several discussions with Khem about this holiday he insisted that it was a regular work day, even though the students wouldn’t be on campus. All my friends were horrified that I had to work on Holi as it’s the one day in Nepal when absolutely nobody works. I dressed in my worst clothes and found a cabbie who was willing to take me to work. When I arrived, I was the only one there until Khem and the visiting Swiss consultant arrived and were able to let me into my office. Khem insisted that the other staff members would show up at 3:00 for the management meeting we had scheduled. At about 2:00, he pulled out his laptop, checked the list of staff holidays (which I didn’t even know existed) and said “oh, I guess it’s a holiday today”. At this time of day it was impossible for me to go home as the streets were crazy with the festival. I finally managed to convince him to drive me home. It never occurred to him to apologise for having me work on a holiday or to offer me compensation.

This was pretty much the last straw for me. The next day I asked him when I could expect to receive the money he owed me and he expressed disbelief that there was anything outstanding. He chased down the accountant and I finally received my February wages by the end of the day. Late in the afternoon the following day I got the remainder of my January wages. I decided to cut my losses and handed in my resignation at the end of the day. (Since I’m here on a tourist visa, I’m not legally employed so this was really just a formality that my work ethic compelled me to do.) Needless to say, he didn’t take it lying down and went into his usual long-winded explanations (read excuses) for everything that had happened. He did take some responsibility but for the most part it was the usual Nepali finger-pointing (e.g. the fact that my visa isn’t moving forward is his brother’s fault, the fact that I didn’t get paid is the accountant’s fault etc.).

He has since sent me a long email explaining how things are going to change and that I should give him another chance. He suggested that I meet with Bharat to discuss my visa on Monday. He makes some valid points and I am certainly giving them some consideration. But ultimately the problem is with his attitude and work ethic, both of which are very hard to define. I can give specific examples and he can promise that that particular thing won’t happen again, but I know that the underlying root of the problem will manifest itself in different ways down the road.

I also understand that I was having a particularly lousy week and am feeling a bit better now. I’m trying to sift through my feelings to determine if work was the main problem or if there are other contributing factors. When I was thinking about quitting I planned to take off into the mountains after I settled everything and try to reconnect with the Nepal I love before I have to leave the country. I am realising now that this is really crucial for me and that I have to get out of Kathmandu for a while. I can’t plan to take any holidays, even within the country, on the salary that I’m earning, which has been a concern for me. I have decided that if I am going to give the job another chance I will need a raise and an immediate vacation so I can escape to the mountains.

I’m not sure why, but the Khumbu has been calling me. I find it a bit strange given that it isn’t my favourite mountain retreat. Perhaps it’s the strong Sherpa presence and the monasteries which are beckoning. I just feel like I have to go there now in order to restore my balance and sanity. I know that I will find the answers I’m looking for there.

In other news, I’m having a very social weekend. A guy from Montreal that I met here a couple of years ago is back to climb Everest for the second time. He had just summitted for the first time when I met him in the spring of 2007. I have been spending a bit of time with him and his climbing partner, and have really been enjoying their company. If I head up into the mountains, I’ll visit them at Everest Base Camp as they prepare for their climb. Also a friend of a friend has just arrived in Nepal to volunteer at a school in the south. I spent the day with her on Friday and had a blast. We have so much in common and it was just great to have some real girl talk with someone I could relate to so well. I think I totally talked her ear off, but she’s willing to come back for another visit this afternoon so it can’t have been that bad. Hopefully we’ll meet up with the guys later today as well as they all leave Kathmandu tomorrow for their various destinations. I am concerned that I will revert back into last week’s funk once all this great Canadian company leaves. I guess my reaction will help to guide me in my decisions.

My immediate plan is to meet with Bharat tomorrow. If my work visa is not forthcoming, this all becomes a moot point as I’ll have to leave Nepal by the end of May and I won’t spend that time working. I’m still waiting for Khem to get in touch with contact details for Bharat and/or an appointment time. I’ll blog again when I have a better handle on what I’m doing, or to report that I’m still bumbling along in a state of confusion.